The Spiritual Ego – Where Is Your Ego Hiding?

The healing process isn’t easy, but it allows you to reflect and expand further into your truth and purpose.

From this place of deep reflection in healing, I discovered just how sneaky the Ego can be. The ego can disguise itself behind spirituality. Perhaps yours has been hiding as well? My intention with this post is to help you shine a light on the Ego to reveal it from its hiding place.

In 2015 I went through my first “awakening.”

I could see beyond my Ego and started connecting more with my intuition and soul. I could see how my pain was navigating my life and started the deep inner work of healing and transformation. No longer could I try to fit into the box society put me in. I continued healing and worked hard to peel back the layers revealing my true soul purpose.

Shortly after my awakening, I started an online business. I was working with clients, making money, working from home, and feeling free. While I felt excited about this new path, I still struggled with my confidence.

Instead of fighting my Ego, I decided to work along with it. Whenever I noticed a negative thought coming from my mind, I counteracted it with a “thank you for trying to protect me” followed by a message of love.

When the little voice said mean things to my body, I recognized this was coming from a place of sadness and pain. I sent my Ego and my body some loving thoughts rather than judgment.

When the little voice told me that I wasn’t “successful” enough, I recognized that this was coming from a place of fear and rejection. I sent myself an extra boost of encouragement as I marched on down my new path.

But when that little voice told me I was better than “non-spiritual” or “unawoken” people, those who were not living their purpose and who still followed along with the norms of society, I believed it.

This is the “Spiritual Ego.”

My Ego told me I was better than all the “sleeping” people around me. I judged those who weren’t as “spiritual,” “enlightened” or as “connected to their purpose” as I was. 

I also thought that I was an expert and knew better than anyone else. This attitude often made me resistant to learning new spiritual truths from those around me.

I didn’t recognize that this message was coming from my ego. I allowed it to fuel my actions and energy in my life, my relationships and my business. While the healing and messages of inspiration, peace, love and positivity were authentic. The validation and approval I was seeking through this spiritual work was not.

My Ego had found a new hiding place.

I had been doing such an excellent job of shining light on all the usual places that it saw a unique place in my subconscious mind, hiding behind something that I perceived as positive. Empowering others with uplifting messages and spiritual teachings is beautiful, but thinking you are somehow “more or better than” is harmful to yourself and others.

Through the heart-opening experience of becoming a new mother, I started to see this truth. While feeling lost, hurt, overwhelmed and exhausted, I began to feel disconnected from myself and my spirituality. My Ego was wiggling its way back into the driver’s seat, and I knew I had to sit with the pain and discomfort to regain control.

As you would expect, my Ego resisted and tempted me with distraction after distraction to prevent me from discovering its hiding place. I kept moving forward and facing the fear. Layer by layer, I continued to heal and release what was no longer serving me, then I found it – hiding in plain sight.

My inner child was hurting. She was feeling neglected and rejected, and my Ego took that pain and manifested it as a false sense of superiority to try to protect her.

I did not judge myself or beat myself up for this discovery. Instead, I sent myself and my ego love. I understand that this awareness is a good thing; it means I am growing, healing and evolving.

This discovery means that I can use this information to help others on their healing journey as well because we’re all in this together.

The soul is humble.

No matter where you or anyone else is on their human journey, your soul only sees through the lens of love. The soul knows that no one is without suffering and does not judge.

We each have a unique timeline and path. There are lifetimes of authentic soul expression and lifetimes of lessons to be learned over and over again.

It is your human consciousness, the Ego, that judges and deflects your attention away from your inner world and projects it outward. It is a misguided attempt to protect you from your pain.

Imagine yourself as a child sitting in a dark corner crying all by yourself. Your ego tries to protect you and keep you safe by separating you from the world that hurt you. It doesn’t like to see you sad, but its protection comes from a place of fear. The Ego believes that you are too weak to feel the pain that you experienced in your life.

Deep within you, you know that you are not weak.

You can heal and move through your pain, fear, darkness and discomfort.

Take that child sitting in the corner by the hand, stand them up and tell them they are loved, they are strong, and they are never alone. Tell them to walk with you, out of the corner and through the dark. It is on the other side of this fear that they will find their limitless inner source of light, strength and power.

You were born with free will. You can choose to stay in the corner, or you can decide to open your heart to feel the pain and shine a light on the Ego. When you do this, you will begin to live and create from the higher consciousness of the soul.

If you’re wondering if you could suffer from the Spiritual Ego, use these questions as a quick self-reflection. If you recognize any of your thoughts or actions while reflecting, it’s ok. Be gentle with yourself, and shine love rather than judgment to elevate through this awareness.

Is Your Ego Hiding Behind Your Spirituality?

1. Do you feel superior to others because you have a deeper understanding of the world?

2. Do you feel frustrated by others when they don’t see or understand your perspective?

3. Do you judge people based on the “low vibrational” decisions they make?

4. Do you feel responsible for the happiness of others, or try to change those around you?

5. Do you doubt your path or purpose if something doesn’t unfold as you thought it should?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, give yourself some extra love and compassion. Remember, you are human – part Ego and part Soul, part Heaven and part Earth.

All whole. All one.

The Ego is a crucial piece of the human journey. It isn’t going to go away, but it doesn’t have to navigate your life from a hidden corner of your mind. You can speak to it with love. Acknowledge it’s an unconscious attempt to help you, and tell it that you are ready to face the fear. Tell your Ego that you have some exciting adventures to experience in this lifetime. Invite is to come along for the ride, but show it where to sit; in the passenger seat.

Love,
Megan xo

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