Abandonment Wound Healing – 6 Powerful Spiritual Practices

The abandonment wound is a deep core trauma. It impacts us not only on a human level but also on a Soul level. Healing the abandonment wound is one of the greatest tasks you came here to accomplish.

It is my deepest belief that unhealed trauma, usually rooted in childhood, is the only thing separating us from the freedom of Love. This allows us to remain trapped in the control of the fear-based Ego mind. This is true not only for us as individuals but also for us as a collective.

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Part of our Soul journey here on earth is to see our true selves and how we are connected beyond the Ego. We set out on a journey into this “world of illusion” to find our light in the darkness and become conscious in the world of unconsciousness.

Right now, humanity is experiencing a massive awakening. We are being called to heal our deepest wounds to create space for our souls to integrate into our physical mind and body. If you are reading this, you are being called to drive deeper into the “darkness” of your inner world to heal.

You are strong enough to feel, deal with, and heal all of the dense energy that keeps you trapped in the low vibrations of fear and control. Deep down, you know this to be the absolute truth.

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The Bigger Picture Behind the Abandonment Wound

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It can be helpful to see the bigger picture behind the abandonment wound.

Your Soul is on a mission to expand, learn and grow through the frequency of love in a world where we are seemingly “separate” from love.

Your higher self is always working to support you in bringing your Soul consciousness further into the vibrational frequencies of this dimension. It does this through healing.

You can take the “darkness” of human suffering and transmute it into the light of the Soul. You do this by bringing understanding, love and compassion to the experiences in your life that brought you the most pain. This is where you find your strength.

Your Soul is calling you to shine a light on the parts of yourself you keep hidden away in shame and fear. The parts of yourself that you have abandoned.

Before you were born, your higher self chose to have your human self take on many specific challenges in your early life to help your soul evolve, including healing through the abandonment wound. By design, you experienced unique challenges as a child to support the “lessons” you are here to learn. The answers to the unique healing puzzle of self-discovery are hidden deep within your subconscious mind.

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The Abandonment Wound Through the Lens of a Child

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As a child, your view of the world was limited. You could not see or understand that your caregivers and other important adults in your life were also dealing with their unresolved traumas.

Your child self believed that everything they said and did was an absolute reflection of you and your worth. You integrated everything from them: the good and the bad. This created the lens that you have for yourself and the world now.

• If you felt that they didn’t accept you for who you are just by being you, you might have believed that who you are isn’t good enough.
• If they didn’t see you, understand you, or care for you how you needed them to, you might have believed that you weren’t important enough to be here.
• If they didn’t love you how you wanted and deserved to be loved, you might have believed you weren’t worthy of love.

It is human nature to do whatever it takes to survive. On some level, as children, we know that we need to be loved and cared for to survive. Out of instinct, you reject and self-abandon your true self in a desperate attempt to be loved.

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Abandonment Wound Origins

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The depth of the abandonment wound pain varies between individuals and can look different for each person. Be patient in your healing process, and remember that the deeper the hurt you experience, the more potential space you hold for healing and soulful expansion.

The first step in healing the abandonment wound is to become conscious of the wound and recognize how it impacts your life. There are many situations and experiences that can cause us to “self-abandon.”

Here is a list of some of the ways the abandonment wound can be inflicted in childhood.

• Being raised by emotionally or physically unavailable caregivers who likely have abandonment wounds themselves.
• If a parent or other important adult physically or emotionally abandoned you in your life.
• Emotional, sexual, physical abuse or neglect.
• Rejection, bullying or isolation from your peers.
• If you had one or more alcoholic or drug-dependent caregivers.
• Experiencing your parents getting a divorce or separation.
• If you were put up for adoption.
• If you had a parent or other important caregiver, die.

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Energetic Influences of Unresolved Trauma

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On a spiritual and energetic level, without healing your deep inner abandonment wounds, your energy field is kept in a constant vibrational frequency of “survival.” The weight of old trauma, fear, and unresolved pain is dense, stagnant, and heavy. Trapped trauma literally and figuratively weighs you down. It keeps you stuck and prevents you from living a soul-fulfilling life.

Every single one of us has strength, love, and power flowing through our energy. Your intuition is always trying to communicate this with you. When your true self is clouded by external influences, such as the energy of others, pain from the past, and the belief that you are ‘not enough,’ your intuitive healing gifts cannot shine through.

Visualize your inner light like the sun.

When the sun isn’t shining because there are clouds in the sky, we don’t question if the sun is or isn’t there. We know the sun is hidden behind the clouds.

The only difference between your inner light and the sun’s light is that you are the creator of your Universe, and therefore, you decide when the sun will shine. By healing your abandonment wounds, you can clear the storm within you and live a life guided by your inner light.

Most of us don’t think about ourselves or healing in this way. We have been disempowered and conditioned to believe we must protect our energy. We live in a perpetual state of false protection rather than knowing we have the strength to feel the pain within us and heal it. This “protective” energy can appear in our lives in many self-destructive and damaging ways.

Here are some examples:

• Self-sabotaging yourself or your relationships to keep yourself “safe” from feeling your true emotions: to grow in our relationship with ourselves and others, we will always be triggered to face and heal your inner abandonment wounds.
• Developing addictions/looking for an “escape”: numbing the pain through drugs, sex, food, dieting, alcohol, fitness, work, social media, and technology.
• Perfectionism: striving for everything to be “perfect” as it gives you a false sense of security of being “in control,” even if only temporarily
• Communication blocks: you may find it difficult to express yourself clearly, or you may be unable to find your voice at all.
• Emotional withdrawal: you may shut down, react impulsively, or withdraw from situations that trigger “unpleasant” emotions such as sadness, anger, and disappointment.
• Unconsciously or consciously denying yourself of your true desires: you may go along with what somebody else wants instead of expressing what you want or believe in.
• Unhealthy conflict resolution in relationships: when you carry many unresolved conflicts within your own energy, it is more difficult to resolve conflicts in your interpersonal relationships.
• Rejecting your “shadow” self: you unconsciously deny the “undesirable” traits or parts of yourself; instead, you may project them onto others.
• Rejecting healthy partners: out of fear of the unknown, healthy relationships may feel uncomfortable because they are unfamiliar and lack the toxicity that feels exciting.
• Confusing longing for love or developing an addiction to toxic or unavailable love: as your brain was being developed, you may have been longing for the unavailable love from a primary caregiver, which created your deep core beliefs around human connection and love.
• Codependency: at the expense of your own mental, emotional or spiritual well-being, you may find a sense of purpose and an escape from your pain by attempting to fix and heal everyone else’s problems.

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Pain as an Invitation for Healing the Abandonment Wound

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As part of the human journey, we are repeatedly presented with opportunities to revisit our core wounds from a greater perspective. From a human lens, it may appear that people are making the “same mistakes,” but on a soul level, this repetitive cycle is an invitation and opportunity to move inward and heal the wound.

Simply choosing to accept the invitation to start healing will shift your energetic vibration into a higher frequency, beginning the process of coming back to your true self.

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How to Heal the Abandonment Wound

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Healing this deep soul-level wound will elevate your energy into the vibration of thriving rather than surviving. As part of healing, you must open yourself up to seeing all the fragmented pieces that you have unconsciously made “separate” from you out of fear, rejection, or shame.

Reflect on your Relationships with your Parents or Primary Caregivers

Our parents were our first “idols” and ultimately formed our ideas and modelled our personal relationship with “God/Creator.” We looked up to them and depended on them for survival and whether it served us or not, learned what we know about life and love from them.

Journal Prompts:

• What do you love about your mother/father/caregiver?
• Do you see any of these qualities in yourself?
• What are the things you don’t like?
• Do you see any of these qualities in yourself?

Reflect on Your Romantic Relationships

As an invitation for healing, our romantic relationships often mirror the unhealed trauma we’ve been holding onto from our childhood.

Journal Prompts:

• What are the things you love about your current/previous partners?
• What were the things you didn’t like?
• Do you see any of these qualities in yourself?
• Were there any parts of the relationship that you could consider unhealthy?
• Are there any ways you might have been showing up in an unhealthy or low vibrational way?

Connect with your Inner Child

The inner child within you needs to be seen, heard and loved in a way that only you can see, hear and love them.

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Practice: Sit with your eyes closed and think back to an experience in your childhood that was difficult for you. Invite this version of your childhood self to communicate with you. Imagine holding them or sitting face to face to show them you are listening.

Journal Prompts:

• What does my inner child want to tell me?
• What does my inner child want to hear?
• How can I help my inner child feel safe and loved?
• How will I know my inner child needs my attention?
  
  For additional healing and spiritual support, check out my Inner Child Soul Session.

Practice Mindfulness and Meditation

When we are present and flowing with life, we receive the clearest guidance from our highest selves. The past is an important part of our lessons here on earth. Integrating these experiences into the current moment is where we find the wisdom to move forward. Breathe and be. Calm the mind, and your soul will speak.

To begin or deepen your daily meditation practice, check out my Mind, Body, Heart, and Soul Healing Meditation Collection.

Energy Healing

When dealing with the abandonment wound, energy gets stuck in the heart chakra and the lower “earth” chakras, preventing these energy centers from functioning optimally. Blocks in the heart chakra prevent you from truly feeling what you need to feel and process to move forward. Blocks in the root, sacral, and solar plexus chakras keep you stuck in the same repetitive cycles. Opening and clearing the chakras creates space for new energy and movement for healing. My Open, Balance and Clear Your Chakras guided visualization has been created to support your healing journey.

To receive additional love and support, you can always reach out and send me a message! I’d be happy to support you in any way I can. I also encourage you to check out my post “Healing through the 7 Types of Love” to learn more about how we heal through the path of Love.

Practice Universal Love, Self-Love and Compassion

The highest frequencies of universal, unconditional Love begin from the love of self. To love yourself transcends our human self into the higher vibrations of love, light, unity and healing. In the early stages of your healing journey, especially when facing your shadow self, it’s natural to want to reject or judge. Have patience, and ask your higher self and Source for strength. The energy of compassion, love, forgiveness and acceptance will shine a light to dissolve shame and fear. To love yourself unconditionally is to love all of you, the light and the dark.

Love,
Megan xo

I only send occasional emails with new blog posts or other relevant healing information to support you.